As someone who cares about the wellbeing of humanity, I’m going to say this as simply as possible, “Stop Being Self-Indulgent!” So much of the suffering that I see is a product of people being excessively hedonistic. For many of us, we are so consumed by our thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors, that we no longer see them as self-indulgent. These behaviors have become harmful habits and we take little responsibility for the creation of our thoughts or the consequences of our actions.
Our self-indulgences manifest themselves in many ways: over eating and spending, gossiping, negative thoughts, anger, drama, excessive drinking and drug use, self-pity, sexual promiscuity, and infidelity. When we indulge in these behaviors, we go against the very grain of who we are and end up living with a diminished sense of self. The impact of this is that we rob ourselves of the possibility of inner peace and full manifestation of our own personal greatness.
To be clear, I am not talking about the occasional piece of chocolate cake, a lazy Sunday afternoon, or processing out emotional upset. These things can alleviate stress, create ease, and bring joy to our lives. I have a girlfriend who brilliantly found a way to self-indulge without getting consumed. While in the midst of her divorce, she called me and said, “I am having a pity party, I have set my alarm for 3pm, at which time the party will be over. Now, will you listen to me for the next 30 minutes while I feel sorry for myself?” Of course I said yes, and true to her word, when the timer went off, she said “Enough!” and then turned the conversation into a forward moving plan. Unfortunately many of us do not have this type of awareness or discipline.
I often hear people say it is “hard to do the work.” But think about the amount of mental and physical energy it takes to maintain a life that is weighed down by the guilt, shame, and self-loathing that accompany an excess of self-indulgence. It is harder to put a marriage back together that has been ripped apart by an affair, than it is to practice mindfulness and self-discipline. The sweetness of forgiveness always taste better than the bitterness of resentment. Yet there is an epidemic of people looking to be offended, instead of embracing life with gratitude and joy.
Personal growth and empowerment are addictive, in the same way working out is. The more we do it, the better we feel in our own skin. Start to check in with yourself regularly. Ask yourself “Am I being the person I hold myself out to be?” “Am I suffering?” And if yes, “What can I shift to free myself?” You must dig deep, be fearless, and leave no stone unturned. If you need guidance, than boldly seek it.
If you think you are too far down the path of self-destruction, I am telling you it is never too late to make a U-Turn. Reset your inner compass for the path that honors your highest self and divine purpose. Remember the brightest lights come out of the darkness. The universe is conspiring for you by creating opportunity for you to shine bright. All you have to do is choose it. Humanity needs you to be your best. And as your best, you can live into the possibility of inner peace and manifest your greatest self.